Do you remember the last time you were really hungry? You may not.
Many people aren’t sure what normal eating actually is and don’t actually eat when our bodies are telling us that we are hungry. We tend to eat when we are bored, in social environments, feeling emotional, or in many other non-hunger related situations.
Eventually our bodies forget how to eat normally. There is a disconnect between hunger and eating, which can lead to many issues such as eating disorders.
To get our bodies back on track, we need to understand exactly what is “normal” when it comes to taking food into our bodies.
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When we discuss attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), we often hear about symptoms such as difficulty paying attention, impulsivity, and disruptive behavior. These only tell part of the story, however. One of the most difficult aspects of ADHD to deal with is the tumultuous emotions. These emotions are difficult to measure, but they affect relationships, self-esteem, and overall happiness. Understanding and seeking help for these emotions, however, can really help.
There are a number of effects common to the emotional turbulence of ADHD. One very common emotional effect is hypersensitivity. Emotions can change from neutral to extreme very quickly. This intensity can be very difficult to deal with and can also negatively impact social situations and relationships. Another common emotional issue is being very sensitive to criticism. This effect, often called rejection-sensitive dysphoria, can make you feel like you are being teased or rejected, even if that was not the intention of the people around you. This can be a very isolating feeling and harm your relationships with others, as well as your self-esteem.
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Women are taught that they are the keepers of the family from a young age. The men go out and make the money and the women keep the family running. While that is an outdated sentiment, often women still feel this way. This is part of the reason why divorce can be so psychologically devastating particularly for women.
And the guilt only intensifies if there are children involved. There is a sense of “I should have been able to keep it together.” Because of this, it’s not uncommon for women to begin feeling depressed and overwhelmed. This depression can lead to more feelings of guilt, which can lead to more depression. Once a woman enters a guilt-depression-guilt cycle, it can be difficult to emerge from it.
To avoid entering this cycle, it’s important to step back. It’s normal to feel guilty about your part in the relationship, but don’t take on the responsibility of the whole situation. Remember that you were in the relationship with someone else who also was responsible for its outcome. With the exception of a few circumstances, it is rarely ever just one person’s fault that a relationship dissolved.
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Once you’ve made the big decision to begin counseling, the next challenge is finding the right person to talk to. If you simply Google “Skokie therapists” you’ll come up with scores of names. Sifting through the results without really knowing what you’re looking for can be overwhelming. How do you narrow it down to the one person who can help your unique problems?
While finding the right counselor for you can be a complicated process, taking the first steps are easy.
Five Steps to Finding The Right Counselor
1. Ask a friend. If you feel comfortable talking about it, ask friends and family for any recommendations of counselors they have liked. If no one you know is receiving therapy or doesn’t like their counselor, seek ideas elsewhere. Try asking your physician or a leader from your spiritual community for advice. They may know of a counselor who will work well for you.
2. Check online. Looking for counselors online is convenient and very telling. When you visit a therapist’s website, you can get a feeling for who they are. Does their site seem modern and friendly? Chances are that the counselor is too. It’s also a great way to learn about the specializations and services of that therapist. If your problems are one of their specialties, you can bet that you will be receiving excellent care.
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Online Employment Information
These guides offer listings of employment resources, career exploration guides, salary guides, and much more.
Job-Hunt.org offers numerous well-selected links to job search resources for the world. Users can search for job sites by location, profession, industry or job type. Site owner, Susan Joyce, has included several other useful articles and information resources, including articles on protecting privacy online and choosing a job site.
This online guide to the job search is developed and maintained by Richard Bolles. It was developed to supplement his print publications (“What Color is Your Parachute”) Included on this site is his Net Guide to the best job search and career information sites online. Read more >
The Counseling Center for Emotional Growth (CCFEG) hopes these external website resources will be of assistance. CCFEG is not responsible for the privacy practices, content, or reliability of other websites. Please read the privacy policies of the external sites since their privacy practices.
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Stress is an all too frequent topic for discussion especially during these trying economic times. We often describe everything that is going on in our life rather than the emotional effect of these events on our bodies. Hence stress is really the inability to integrate emotional experiences with our physical self. Emotions help us evaluate the impact of life experiences. We automatically feel anger, sadness, or happiness, however we do not always reflect on these emotions.
Reflecting on our emotional responses is essential for personal and emotional growth. Understanding emotions is at the root of counseling and allows individuals to integrate emotions with their experience and redirect to healthy behaviors. How often do we hear people say, “when I am depressed I eat” or, “when I get mad I just shut down”. Such responses lead to lifelong problems such as obesity, heart disease, and general health problems. Changing behaviors can and often does help, but sustained change really requires self-reflection, personal understanding, and the ability to re-direct our emotions in healthy ways.
Emotionally focused counseling begins with trust and gradual awareness of feelings. Gradual personal story telling will facilitate a deeper understanding of oneself and the ability to label core feelings. Once feelings are labeled then counseling involves evaluation of adaptive and maladaptive responses to these core feelings. Healthy lifestyles gradually evolve through continued self-coaching, awareness, and the ability to talk about the emotional effects of life experiences. Read more >
Many of us work years to establish our career and integrity as individuals. When it comes to the workplace many ethical principals fall prey to greed, and lust for power. Often power comes in the form of hostility, threats, intimidation, and purposeful acts of omission or isolation.
Reporting workplace hostility and intentional misconduct is often met with denial and a “blame the messenger attitude.” A boss or a human resource representative will often ask the messenger of workplace badgering “what have you done to deal with so and so”. The reply is often “I have done everything I can think of to please this person or to resolve my discomfort” and now I am coming to you to stage a complaint.
While there are several “resources” to help employees deal with workplace hostility, many of these resources are a cover for the employer’s protection. The message again becomes, “something is wrong with the messenger, and not the unethical or hostile boss.”
What can you do to survive workplace hostility?
- Document everything you do and what is said to you by your aggressor. Include specifics date, time, and as much of the conversation that you remember.
- Do not gossip about the situation. Maintain a low profile as if the aggressor does not exist.
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Elizabeth Kubler-Ross is credited with wonderful works on death, dying, and personal grief. In one of her works “Life’s Lessons she states “if life is a school, then loss is a major part of the curriculum.” Loss is painful, and can thrust individuals into despair. Dealing with loss initially begins with being present with the loss. Whatever is felt at the time of loss is personal and real and time is needed to explore and heal the loss. Healing may not always be direct and may be marked by ups and down, but can be transformed by sharing that experiences within a trusting relationship. Grief is personal and can be rekindled long after the tragic experience. Within counseling, grief is explored through a process of mourning. Mourning involves taking time to talk about our experience in ways that help us acknowledge rather that than deny our loss.